People who play DotA are fucking assholes. Yep, they are. One minute its 'Tq. Oh man I luv ur chakra magic," and the next its "Fucktard. Why didn't you help me?" And I'm like "What? I can't help I haven't added mana leak yet," and they'll be like "You run so fast. Whack lah!" and I'm like "Even if I whack they would still have chased you and killed you. And then kill me." and then they're like "Noob." WTH?!
Nevertheless, I do have fun experiences with DotA. Like this once when the new map (I think, maybe quite long ago like 6.56?) came out and this host refused to let people who came in to download the map, there was these two goons who, the moment they came in, started switching their placing at light speed. It was blue teal purp yellow orange pink.... before you could say 'map stealer'. And to think that they actually got as far as 35 percent! I couldn't stop laughing. At them, and the host.
Just yesterday, me calvin and winnie were having trouble deciding what to play. We were bored of 3v3, and neither me nor calvin was in the mood for mini games. So I was like, alright, on the count of 5, everyone shout what you want to play. And I was like, "5,4,3,2, [long pause for dramatic effect]..................1."
"Spartans!"
"3v3!"
"DotA!"
"I will lag during DotA!"
"Spartans is retarded!"
"3v3 so boring!"
Here we go again...
Eventually, [I don't know how but] we settled on a Starcraft map. "What's this?" I asked. "Human = Terran, Orc=..." I forget which is zerg and which is protoss. Anyway, I noticed he left undead out. Then I remembered. Undead = auto lose.
"So, whats undead?" I asked purposely. "Auto lose." Winnie's and my race immediately changed to undead.
"Oieeee!"
I changed mine to Terran. Winston changed his to random. "Winston, don't leh. Very scary." I disagreed. It was exciting. Like Russian Roulette. Anyway, Winston insisted and Calvin was forced to start the game.
The game started. 'knockoutman was defeated' the screen said. I was about to type something sarcastic when the screen flashed, 'ilovemtg has left the game.' I couldn't stop laughing.
We actually went through this 3-4 times. (Poor Calvin!) Dying because we tried one time too many with random... and at a particularly amusing incident, this is what happened.
Game starting in 5...
Game starting in 4...
Game starting in 3...
I changed my race to undead. Calvin left the game. I laughed like crazy. So much so that my mother strongly encouraged me to stop, lest I suffocate to death.
And speaking of laughing like crazy, I remember this once my sister told me about her weirdo friend. It was during her chinese call where she recalled this incident.
We were at Fish and Co. having lunch and she was like, "I tell you, that _______ is crazy!"
"What?" I asked, getting slightly annoyed that my food was taking the time beyond what was acceptable to arrive.
"Her! You know the other day, in Chinese class, she was like, Omg Joce, you know your brother? HAHAHAHA he was, OMG HAHAHA in Sembawang! HAHA! With a plastic bag! HAHAHAHAHA Picking HAHAHAHAHA Rubbish! OMG HAHAHAHA! And I was like ________ keep quiet! And my teacher was like Jocelyn please stop talking," She made a face.
I blinked for a few seconds, mainly because I needed time to digest all that she had said and also because I had difficulty deciding if my sister's school was actually a school or an insane asylum. The way I see it ___________ definitely has a problem if she speaks with her sentences interspersed with maniacal laughter. Right, definitely a problem.
"Your sister got scolded for you!" my mother said.
"What? Ohhhh... I didn't know you cared!" I said and made a face. "Anyway, she can kiss my ass because X [______'s crush-who-shall-not-be-named from RINCC] said she's a bitch!" I continued. "Actually not really, he just kept saying that I look like her and I was like what does she look like and he was like you don't know what she looks like and I was like I don't even know her and he was like well, she looks like a bitch!"
"That means you look like a bitch too," my sister pointed out.
I bit my lip. "Well... I didn't see it in THAT way."
Jesus, time to start saving for that plastic surgery I've always wanted.
Time: 2.30 est.
Location: IMM
The Scene: A partially full restaurant Baystreet 21. Mainly because its pretty late for lunch.
I like coffee. But of course, I'm using the term 'coffee' very loosely, because the way I make my coffee, you'd probably confuse it with a milkshake. Well, I love creamer too but that's a different story.
"After this, I guess Gareth will accompany me to giant and walk around while you go back home to study," my mum said to my brother, passing him the house keys. No buts from my brother- he's in the midst of the A levels.
I pretended not to hear and stirred my 'coffee'. Finally, I protested, "But.. I'm very busy!"
"Oh yeah? What with?" my mum queried.
I tried hard to think of an excuse. Sadly, since the beginning of the holidays, my timetable consists of nothing much other than eating, sleeping, bathing, and playing computer games. "I... I'm very busy... I need to sort out my underwear drawer!" My chest heaved. I caught a few heads turning in my direction.
My mum stared. "You don't have an underwear drawer," she accurately pointed out.
I let out a huge sigh. "And I should get one as an excuse from now on," I thought.
Which is how I found myself strolling through Giant with my mum that Saturday. A perfectly good saturday spent grocery shopping. Boo-hoo.
Well, but its pretty amazing how grocery shopping can be. I found it a refreshing change from my usual activities which are usually in front of the computer. It's also about that time of the year where I make silly resolutions to clear my desk - which largely involves staring at my desk, then going off to play because it's simply messy beyond hope.
So anyway, as we passed a rack of clothes, I pointed out that I wanted to get a pair of FBTs. Guy FBTs. Not those kinds that girls wear, not the super-short kind that you probably help save the earth by wearing since the minimal amount of cloth required probably means you helped save a few cotton plants, if that counts. Immediately my mum suggested that I wear the girl kind. And she helped picked out a light green pair.
"Forget I asked for anything," was the best I could manage.
Anyway, my sister insists that even the super short FBTs are actually meant for guys. "It has that netting inside," she reasons. "You mean female shorts have no netting?" I asked. She stared.
"No!" she shrieked. "Of course not."